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WHO: Leon Kuwata, Rin Tohsaka, Inigo, and Owain
WHAT: House E Catch-all Post!
WHEN: April 24?! (Lemme know if a different day I have no idea)
WHERE: House E
WARNINGS: The most horrible thing imaginable. Leon and Inigo in a room with a cute girl. Also Owain.

[Since Owain didn't really know anyone here other than Inigo, he just kind of managed to follow him to figure out their housing situation. Even if the idea of staying in the same general house as Inigo wasn't bad enough (it wasn't actually that bad) the fact that he didn't even fully understand the concept of a modern house was pretty worrying in itself. Running water? Toilets? What are these things.

Either way, here we are in House E, doing House E things. WHAT THINGS ARE WE DOING.]

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[He is answered with crossed arms and a frown. Leon probably wishes he stayed in bed and slept in.]

Who said I wasn't feeling well?

[ Huh-- what suddenly changed, huh?! Just now she was sleeping beauty, and now it's more like raging beauty.. ]

You were drooling all over my shoes! [ Today in "things you don't tell a girl"... ] C'mon, you don't remember the way you walked around like a zombie just now?!

Ladies don't drool!

[brb getting right up in his face!!!]

Are you trying to say something? Because between me and you, I'm pretty sure I'd come out on top.

Huh-- what, no way..! I always top!

[ If you know what I mean. ]

Bottom feeding losers never come out on top. You have a lot of work to do before you even want to think about that.

Who the hell are you calling a bottom feeding loser?! I'm a super cool guy-- do you even know who you're talking to? [ He huffs. Super manly. ]

I'm an upcoming rock star, a legend..!

[ Well, not so upcoming now he's.. dead.. but that's a minor detail. ]

Judging by your looks, you're trying to be like one of those edgy London rock bands, aren't you?

[Someone has been to London, clearly!!]

It's not going to happen.

Uh, I dunno, are Guns 'n Roses from--

[ Wait. Hooold on a moment, what was that second part she said? He can't believe it so much that it doesn't even get through to him until he's already halfway through the sentence.. ]

.. What do you mean, "not going to happen"?! [ Why do all girls not believe in him, look at him, he's so totally convincingly cool! (No.. pe...) ]

Exactly what it sounds like. And unless you get me a cup of tea, it's only going to get worse.

.. Ah, you're threatening me now?!

[ Why does he keep attracting the crazy girls. Why. ]

I'm not supposed to be your lapdog, I just-- I don't even get what you're trying to do here! [ Girls are too confusing.. ]

Now you're getting somewhere. Lapdog sounds absolutely perfect.

Did you miss the part where I said not?!

[ Even Leon can only be so desperate, really. Even Leon. ]

I'm sorry, lapdog. I've already told you what I want so please go get it.

[ .. Give him a moment to consider one thing that might actually make him agree.. ]

If I do all that shit for you, would you go on a date with me? [ Pleasesayyespleasesayyespleasesayyes.. ]

Huh? Yeah, yeah, sure. Just get it done.

[The challenge of not being seen as a man. PROVE YOURSELF LEON.]

[ WHO CARES ABOUT THAT HE GOT A DATE.... his life is perfect now!! Just look at that eager smile, he really must be a dog. ]

S-sure, I'll get it done right away! Just wait here! [ He's too busy celebrating on the inside to even mind. ]

Good! I expect top quality.

[ Then top quality is what you will get!! Or.. well, Leon's best, anyway, that's got to count for something as he darts off into the kitchen and then returns with a cup of tea just for her.. ]

Here you go!

Thank you very much.

[She will just enjoy this. Because no matter how bad it is, it has the sweet taste of victory.]

Is there anything else I can do?!

[ Not like he's usually this eager, but seriously, anything for that date, he doesn't even care how low he has to go!!

.. okay, not too low, but still.. ]

Do you know how to cook?

[ Swallowing the urge to be rude and ask if she thinks he looks like some sort of chick.. ]

.. no. I mean, nothing complicated. [ He can make her a sandwich.

Probably. ]

Then get in the kitchen and make me something simple like a sandwich.

[Yeah, she went there.]

[ Anyone ought to be ashamed of themselves for just saying "yeah, okay" to something like that, but.. for a date.. well, let's just say Leon is willing to go pretty low. Desperate times, desperate measures, etc. ]

Yeah, okay-- just wait here! [ And he's off to make her a sandwich too.. what a lapdog. ]

[What a good person. Time to actively marginalize him. He'll get his date but it probably won't be fun.]

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